As I sit on my sofa this evening, I find myself thinking back over the year that I have had. It has been quite a journey, I've grown personally and professionally, I've learned that no matter what comes my way, God will always look out for me. And, honestly, even though I'm still single (and no I am not actively seeking a relationship), I have (finally) learned how to enjoy my singleness. Learned how to enjoy the pleasures and freedom that come with being single.
It is a joy having the wisdom that comes with age and experience, it's delightful knowing that there is no need for me to strive to please anyone (not saying that being in a relationship means you have to please someone, so please don't get the wrong idea). I mean having the freedom that comes from doing what pleases you, regardless of what anyone thinks. When I blade with my son, and the neighbors look at me as though I have lost my mind, when suddenly I break out into a race to the car with him in the parking lot, or when I'm dancing to a tune in the car, it's all completely free and just me being me. I refuse to allow myself to be limited by anyone's thoughts of me or ideas of what I should or should not do because I am 36, not 25.
Perhaps that's why so many people these days are getting sick, stresses, and snapping. They are too concerned with what others will think, with doing what they've been told to do, with doing what they think they are supposed to do because they are a certain age. Who cares what age you are as long as you're enjoying doing what you do? As long as you're not hurting anyone, then why worry that "oh my gosh, isn't she a little too old to be dancing in the car?" Or perhaps, other shoppers are thinking, wow, she should know better than to run in the parking lot, she's acting like a child."
All I say is whatever. When my son is an adult, and he has his own children, he will always have these memories of the times his mom taught herself to blade so she could hang out with him, times when mom played the Wii and trounced him soundly (and loudly) in Need for Speed or the times he won the race to the car from the Target exit door. And I tell them, those are the things that really matter, those are the times that are most valuable, not working all the time, living in a big house or being all mighty and powerful. What matters most is and always will be the memories I create with my son. Perhaps, there maybe a guy in the picture so that he can be a part of making those memories, but until we get to that point, then it will be my little guy and I making and sharing those memories!!
I implore you, as you spend the next two days thinking over what you have or have not done this year, don't focus on just work or things around you, focus on whether or not you have been happy this past year. Have you done what you wanted to do or have you allowed yourself to become a slave to others' standards? Have you celebrated your life or have you been brought so low that you only exist to please the boss, the neighbors or your family? Are you only here to meet others' expectations or and for you?
If you feel that you are, then please, please make 2009 a year when you break all of those molds and break free of those chains!! Make 2009 the year that you decide to celebrate YOU - do something just for you and no one else? Treat yourself to a weekend, don't think about anything other than what you want to do and where you want to go!
Above all, have a wonderful, safe and happy New Year!!!!
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